You know how sometimes, as a wife, mom, woman, human being,
etc., life takes over and time just disappears like you’ve been abducted by
aliens? Yeah, that’s what the last few months have been like. All the anticipation of future events
(moving, new restaurant opening, etc.) has now faded as these events have actually
occurred. However, all the energy that
was dedicated to them meant precious little time was devoted to the blog. I can’t tell you how many incomplete starter
posts are filling the Notes section of my iPhone. As a result, now that I have all this free
time, you can anticipate lots of upcoming entries on such outdated events as my
21st birthday, the Cuban missile crisis, and my thoughts on the
birth of Prince George.
Most life-altering event to occur over the past few months?
We finally moved. Yes, after twelve
years, I finally said a fond farewell to my rent controlled one bedroom
apartment in Hamilton Heights, and the clan Rafferty has moved onward and
upward to Hudson Heights. After
surviving the experience, I have some wisdom to share.
1. Move often or never.
I thought I did a really good job
purging. I took at least four big bags
of stuff to the Salvation Army. We
tossed three crappy pieces of furniture. I threw away sheets with holes. And yet, after allllll that, it took two days
to move twelve years of crap. I recently
ran a 5K with a friend, who also helped us move (and is still my friend), and
asked him if he was saving his race bib.
He gently reminded me that he had moved five times in six years, and
part of doing that with ease was not holding on to piles of crap like race
bibs. So if you’re a person who, ahem, “accumulates,”
don’t ever move. Or move a lot, and odds
are you’ll keep less and less every time.
2. Hire movers.
I moved from a closet-sized room in a
shared apartment in Williamsburg to an enormous one bedroom in 2003; the
Husband showed up on my doorstep in 2007 with a rucksack, duffel bag, and a
boomerang from his year in Australia. We
are moving amateurs. He figured a few of
our beefiest friends would be enough to shove everything in a UHaul. Two trips, one lost UHaul dolly, and an old
apartment still full of stuff later, he conceded that my original request to
hire movers had merit.
3. Pack your stuff in actual boxes.
Our moving supplies included proper moving
boxes, a mishmash of beer and wine boxes from the bar, and several boxes of
garbage bags from Target. We did a
horrible job packing. We are moving
amateurs, remember? There were a lot of things still being shoved into tote
bags and plastic bins on the morning of the move. I read a lot of “tips” on fancier mom blogs –
color coded tape! Paper plates as dish barriers! None of that happened. I mean, we were kind of organized. I’d say the most effective thing we did was
packing 90% of our most important items in clear plastic bins. What you can see, you can find. On that note – boxes labeled “kitchen,” “living
room,” etc, are useless. You have to
write what’s IN them on the OUTSIDE. I
spent half an hour searching desperately for a mug on our first morning in the
new place. How am I supposed to unpack without coffee?! I fared better in Mini’s
room, where Dogfish Head boxes were neatly labeled “soft toys,” “sheets &
blankets,” etc. However, if anyone has
seen the baby monitor, please let me know.
4. Have someplace to put your stuff when you
unpack.
In a weak moment, I allowed the Husband to
throw away the 17-year-old Ikea dresser that I got from my best friend, who got it
from our friend Isaac. It’ll be nice to
have a proper dresser. See what I did
there? “To have.” Meaning, “currently
don’t have.” Meaning, I’m living out
of Space Bags and suitcases. Who knows
where anything is? There’s a very real possibility that I might end up wearing
a cocktail dress to work this week because I can’t find any pants.
5. Throw away anything you don’t feel like packing.
I mean it.
Dump it. This was a huge leap for
me, the ultimate keeper. But as you’re
getting closer to move date, and you’re torn over saving your last bits of
bubble wrap for your wine collection, say sayonara to all those tchotchkes that
never looked right anyway. I recommend
tossing your bathroom scale.
6. Don’t go on vacation right before you move.
We were supposed to move July 1st,
but our new place was still undergoing renovations, so we postponed until the 6th. I was still stubbornly determined to travel
down to Virginia with Mini to visit my family for Independence Day; the Husband
gallantly offered to finish up the majority of the packing. I promised I’d be back early to help with the
last bits. Alas, a five hour trip took
eleven; I arrived home with an exhausted baby who had vomited spectacularly all
over herself halfway up 95, and wanted nothing more than to lie on the bed in
our empty bedroom with a pizza and Netflix on my iPad. This was definitely a contributing factor to
our move taking two days.
7. Ask Mom.
If yours is anything like mine, she will
drive up from Virginia, follow you around your home with a garbage bag and “encourage”
you to purge those ratty towels and cracked fridge magnets. She will drive you to Home Goods and
encourage you to buy grown up things like a toothbrush holder with matching
soap dish, and silly things like a big fluffy aqua rug for Mini’s ocean-themed
bedroom. She will take your toddler out
for the day, swinging by IHOP and getting her down for a nap way better than
you can. She’ll lend you her car for the
myriad trips back and forth and not bat an eye when you return it with a
quarter tank of gas. Then she’ll go
home, and return three days later with a bag full of shelf liner, so you can
run a nighttime 5K. Thank you Mom. We owe you all of the flowers.
8. Don’t run a 5K the weekend after you move.
Especially if it’s at night, and in
Sheepshead Bay, the literal opposite end of the Five Boroughs from where we
live. It was my first 5K, I had trained
for it and everything, and it was the Color Run, which meant I arrived home at
1:30 AM covered in glowing cornstarch powder and fake tattoos. I can’t accurately describe the physical pain
I was in on Sunday morning. Save your
strength for the important stuff, like hauling cardboard boxes down to the
basement.
9. Get everything delivered.
It’s a new neighborhood. So far I’ve found the Dunkin Donuts, four
playgrounds, and a great wine shop. I’m
relying heavily on a city girl’s best friend in order to survive – delivery. Specifically boxed.com for bulk items, Fresh Direct for groceries, Familyhood sites like soap.com and diapers.com for baby and household necessities, and sites like wayfair.com and dotandbo.com
for well-priced furniture and accent pieces to replace the ones the Husband
left on the curb. Also, since moving sucks
money out of your bank account like a Hogwarts siphoning spell, I always access
these sites through ebates.com.
Seriously, why isn’t everyone using Ebates? They just GIVE YOU MONEY for
clicking through to your chosen site via theirs. And it’s not just a bunch of
stupid sites, either. It’s probably
every e-commerce site you’re already shopping on. P.S. I don’t work for Ebates. I just love telling people about how I get
free money for shopping. You can sign up
via this link and they’ll give me a little bonus for signing up people, but
they do that for everyone. They even
give you a bonus just for signing up. There
is no catch. Shop online, get a check every three months. That’s it.
Boom. Mic drop.
10. Skip unpacking to explore your new neighborhood.
Not only should you know where the best
liquor store is, but taking a break from the terror of unpacking means a chance
to de-stress and get a new perspective.
I still can’t find half our plates, but we did find our way to Fort
Tryon Park, an absolutely exquisite urban oasis at the tip of Manhattan, and
home to a Metropolitan Museum of Art annex, the Cloisters Museum and
Gardens. And we got ice cream on the way
home. Win win.
Love, the Rafferty Girls
